Strong-Headed Shrikeshire Activists Are Calling For An Immediate Ban To The "Offensive" Term Milkman In The Area, And Demanding That The Job Be Referred To As Lactose Deployment Agents
A new campaign, which is led by a group of social justice advocates, argues that the term “milkman” perpetuates gender stereotypes and reinforces the idea that certain jobs are only suitable for men. The movement has been spearheaded by Rights Activist Vivian Batty, who’s grandchildren recently made headline news being the culprits of 5 years of vandalism. Her friend Thora Birchwood also heads the cause, starting a petition for immediate change. The act has so far received over 103 signatures, and has been presented to the Country Parish Council of Shrikeshire.
“It’s not the numbers that count, and there will be more. It’s getting rid of an archaic patronising phrase that undermines the hard work those in the dairy industry, both men and women, endure. We’ve done away with Binmen, now it’s time for the same to happen with the term Milkmen. We are hoping and trusting Shrikeshire will pave way for positive changes throughout the country and it to become common law,” proudly asserts Mrs Batty.
Thora Birchwood chimes in further, “We believe that being called Lactose Deployment Agents is the way forward. The term Milkman sounds like an old fashioned name for a kiddies TV character. We are demanding the respect shown, and that the world moves forward leaving old fashioned derogatory job titles.”
Of course, the move has not been without a spark of controversy. Local Milkman Dan Davies says “With all that’s wrong in the world, why on earth would someone be so vehement about changing something that isn’t broken? I’ve been a milkman for 32 years, well respected in the local community. I just find the whole thing ridiculous, then again the world is going mad. People will call people like me an old fossil stuck in the past, but I don’t care. I’m your friendly neighbourhood milkman and proud.”
“I’ve never heard anyone complain about the term ‘milkman’ before,” said local resident, Alma Jones. “I think this campaign is a waste of time and resources. There are more important issues that we should be focusing on.”
Despite the criticism, the campaigners remain undeterred and have called for the deployment of “lactose deployment agents” in the area. They have even suggested that local officials should provide subsidies for businesses that make the switch to the new term.
Dan and Alma are not alone. Someone who was recently forced to address the issue at a recent press conference, is local Mayor Graham Parsnip, an ardent milk drinker. He is staunchly against the proposal also, and had more than a few words on the issue.
“We really shouldn’t even be talking about this. An admin error meant that any petition over 100 signatures got debated at the Local Council meetings. That should have read 1000 signatures. However, we believe in the traditions of Shrikeshire and our local dairy community. We have had milkmen delivering milk for over 200 years, and calling someone a Lactose Deployment Agent is a hard sell to force upon the local vernacular.”
In fact, Mayor Parsnip forgot to call out all the wonderful women delivering milk and working in the factories and on the milk farms, an oversight we thought we needed to point out. Incidentally for reasons of full disclosure there are 40 percent women on the Council Board and 60 percent men. The vote however was 95 percent against the change.
“We are not looking for a council vote”, announces Vivian Batty, “although it would have been nice to have a swing more in our favour. We are looking to make social change, based on the power of the people. Plus all those on the Council are in pocket, I wouldn’t be surprised, I guess I have to say allegedly. Did Mayor Parsnip reveal that half of those signatures are from men?”
“We need to take action to create a more inclusive society, and changing the language we use is a small but important step,” said Thora Birchwood. “We hope that local officials will take our campaign seriously and make the necessary changes.”
It remains to be seen whether the campaign will gain traction or if the traditional term “milkman” will remain in use. However, it is clear that the issue of language and gender stereotypes continues to be a topic of debate and discussion in Shrikeshire.
